The people who can unlock your iPhone X with their face will be henceforth known as your “X Twins”, short for “Face ID Twins”. Emoji: ♊️📲

Song: App Oddity

I made another musical video. This time I remade David Bowie’s excellent “Space Oddity” with lyrics on the subject of ups and downs of indie app development. It should be more accessible to the general population than my previous video about the programming language Swift.

Lyrics are embedded in the video but here they are in full:

App Oddity
~~~~~~~~~~

App Review to Coder Tom
App Review to Coder Tom
Take your caffeine pills
And put your headphones on

App Review to Coder Tom
Commencing countdown,
you’re logged on.
Check submission
and may Jobs’ love be with you

This is App Review to Coder Tom
You’re featured on first page
And the web sites want to know how much you’ve made
Now it’s time to go out and celebrate

This is Coder Tom to App Review
I’m stepping through the doors
And my head spins in a most peculiar way
And the App Store’s very different today

For here
Am I sitting in my basement
Far from outside world
Why do I feel blue
Is there something I can do?

Though I’m past
one million free downloads
I can’t see many sales
And I think I might've chosen wrong way to go
Tell my customers I care, 
'cause they should know

App Review to Coder Tom
Your app is dead,
there’s something wrong
Can you fix it Coder Tom
Can you fix it Coder Tom
Can you hear us Coder Tom
Can you…

Here am I lying in my basement
Far from outside world
All I feel is blue
And there’s nothing I can do

Introducing Big Red Button for Apple Watch

Are you the president of a nuclear weapon wielding superpower? Congratulations! There’s an app for that.

Introducing the “Big Red Button” app for the Apple Watch — launch the nukes from the convenience of your wrist.

Targeting has never been so easy with a variety of options:

  • Select your target destinations with Siri dictation. Relies on Apple Maps. It’s never wrong
  • Tap a location on a zoomable map
  • A Favourites list of your colleagues from other countries will automatically target their location
  • Quickly rotate and let go of the digital crown to randomly select from a list of predefined targets and let it go. We call this feature “Atomic Russian Roulette”. It’s addicting, you’ll want to rotate and rotate!

Additional groundbreaking features include:

  • Approve launches by signing with your finger on the watch face or by dictating “Sure, why not”
  • Satellite view and the map update in almost-realtime after the target is hit by downloading latest imagery from military satellites. Terraforming has never been so fun
  • Feel the hearts of your enemies stopping with the fantastic haptic feedback of your new toy. (Requires an In-App-Purchase of a backdoor access to their Apple Watches)
  • Uses Force Touch technology to select the size of the warhead. Press harder to hit them harder
  • Game Center integration to compete with your foes, complete with Leaderboards and Achievements

Download now or you’ll be out of the game first!

Song: Cocoa Police

I covered Radiohead’s Karma Police with modified lyrics about some of the attitude towards Apple’s new programming language, Swift, that I saw on the net.

It’s meant to be fun. Lyrics embedded in the video. Enjoy.